Here I Am
Hello from Hollywood. Or from West Los Angeles.
Yes, it’s been too long since I’ve written. Sorry if I’ve sped up the productivity of the world’s workplaces, but I’ve been traveling a lot, I didn’t have wifi where I was living in New York, I’ve had a cold for a week, I had to move, the sun was in my eyes, there was a hole in my glove, and somehow I blame the government too.
Anyhow, like the title says, here I am. I’m laying low all day, trying to get rid of this cold-like thing before I start an exciting new project that I don’t know if I’m allowed to mention yet. When I do though, hold on, Sally! It’ll be a doozy.
In the meanwhile, I’m glad to report that my travels and travails have almost all been for good reasons –for work and for family.
Cinco D’Erby
I went to the Kentucky Derby in Louisville (that’s where they were holding it this year) and got to see my grandma, uncles, aunt, cousins, a great uncle, a step-aunt, some step-cousins, a cousin-in-law, and miscellaneous strangers.
By the way, how can you make sure that you’re in Kentucky? When you see signs like this at the Cingular store…
It’s a looooooooooong day. The Derby itself lasts about two minutes, but it’s the 10th race of the day. To make sure folks buy plenty of mint juleps (sold by strolling vendors alongside cotton candy and hot dogs), the races are spread out with an hour between each one. This gives plenty of time for social observation and commentary.
Here’s all I remember, as I caught a cold somewhere along the way: The most striking thing to me about the Derby aside from the sheer numbers (I think it’s the largest-attended event I’ve ever been to: over 160,000) was the combination of High and Low –the fancy-hatted upper-class in the glass boxes and the truck-hatted working-class in the infield. Not exactly mingling –they were literally separated by locked steel gates. Still, what’s the last event you can think of attended by both Queen Elizabeth, Kid Rock, and O.J. Simpson?
Gimme An E!
A gig, you ask? Yep, I got to add some more snark to the world by commenting for E! on their new Wildest Reality Dating Show Moments 2 show… premiering sometime in June. It was me and only 5 other panelists, so there should be loads of your ol’ pal making fun of people looking for love and/or TV time. The extra bonus this time was the shirt I got to wear. More on that later.
So, are you and the green screen going steady yet?
Were you “Walking in Memphis” with your “True Companion” in “The Rainy Season” in that T-shirt? Are you the man with the plan and a pocket comb? Don’t tell us you rubbed elbows with the elite AGAIN at some E! party or something like that! I’m starting to get jealous!