Get Ready to Get Date-Raped, New York!

About the 2010 Dating Conference.

I am repulsed and yet fascinated by this.  And check out the speakers: Nick Quick AND Entropy!

The Fix-Up

BRAND NEW LIVE COMEDY SHOW hosted and produced by J. Keith!

Come watch a celebrity help fix up single people.  It shall be awesome.
Info and tickets at http://www.thefixupshow.com

You have to see this, New York!

Special SNEAK PREVIEW Tuesday, June 1.  OPENING NIGHT – June 8!

Buy tickets now!

The Manhattan Monologue Slam – I’m a Judge!

Come feel my wrath on June 5 in New York City!  It’s fun (as wraths go).

Manhattan Monologue Slam

7pm door 7:30pm curtain

at Bennett Media Studios

725 Washington Street, NYC

VIDEO: “What’s My Line? – Live On Stage” – Sells Chocolate Candies

Panel: John Oliver, Stephanie D’Abruzzo, Austin Pendleton, Raven Snook.

Guest Marty Koffman.

Hostess: Patti Goettlicher.

Band: Shane Rettig & The Occupations.

Recorded live in New York May 25, 2008.

(c) 2008 van Straaten Entertainment, inc.

Hungover

Friday night I was in shadows at Yankee Stadium, despite the complete lack of sunshine upon me, as the $50 face value seats were surrounded on nearly all sides by concrete. Including the giant overhang about 3 feet above my head.

That’s not even me pointing in that silhouette; it’s the guy in front of me, arm forged to my torso by darkness, positioned as if to say, “Look! That’s where the outside is. Where baseball is played. Someday I hope to be there.”

I hope they take these things into account as they build the new Yankee Stadium across the street.

It’s amazing how seldom baseball owners seem to realize that people who go to their teams’ games would actually like to enjoy the experience.

He’s So Unsual.

Two weeks from tonight I’ll be on stage hosting the first “What’s My Line? – Live On Stage” in New York. Still feels weird. But it’s very exciting as things are actually coming together. I’m beginning to see mentions in the press and we have our first panel locked in….

*Betsy Palmer!
*Michael Riedel!
*Stephanie D’Abruzzo!
*Barry Saltzman!

We have a great Mystery Guest to kick things off and we’re planning some fun surprises to commemorate our first show.

My co-producer and director Jim Newman is about to land at Islip airport after a long day of free travel on Southwest. If all goes well, he’ll be traveling with a bin of our props and a bag full of my tuxedo and ephemera. It would be a bad time for luggage to get lost, though I’d be amused if someone else finds a use for our flip-cards numbered 1 through 10 and a tuxedo that is tailored exactly for me.

Found out today that one of our potential sponsors passed on the opportunities, which is a bummer because we could’ve used their service and I think we would’ve had a great time promoting them. The good news –we’re wide open and available to negotiate! Got anyone who wants to sponsor our show?

Looks like we do have a stage manager and running crew and the theatre reports our first ticket sales –thank you, New York!

Oh, and I got the first batch of post cards! …and there’s a typo. “Unsual” instead of “Unusual”. Nobody noticed it until I opened the package. Oh well.. even more motivation to get rid of them. Some day it will be a collector’s item. For now, I have 1000 reminders that Adobe Acrobat doesn’t have spellcheck. (My blogging tool does have it. Apparently, “spellcheck” is not a word.)

Story Time! See Me Live in New York! –updated–

No cover, no drink minimum, nuttin’. Bring pals and let’s hang out and catch up afterwards.

It’s my first stage time since I’m back in New York, so I hope you can be there. Yay!

Monday, December 17 – 7pm

StorySwap
Time Out New York Lounge
downstairs at New World Stages
340 West 50th Street (btwn 8th and 9th Avenues)
FREE

Ophira Eisenberg and J. Keith van Straaten debut their new story-reading format on the New York storytelling scene with the world premiere of their StorySwap series. A select group of writers read all-true autobiographical stories directly from the page. The twist? They read each others’ stories… and, they don’t know which story they’ll read until they walk on stage! Why? Find out!

Featuring:
Andy Christie (The Liar Show)
Adrianne Frost (My uncle loves her!)
J. Keith van Straaten (host of Yahoo! Answers On The Street)
Theresa Benaquist (Fancy Writer credits)
Mark Katz (He knows Bill Clinton!)
and Ophira Eisenberg (you know, all kinds of stuff)

So Who Is Adrianne Frost?

Besides being a pal, she’s the genius behind this award-winning piece…

Don’t Forget!! – See me in New York for Free!!

No cover, no drink minimum, nuttin’. Bring pals and let’s hang out and catch up afterwards.

It’s the only stage time I think i’ll have in New York this trip, so I hope you can be there. Yay!

Wednesday October 3rd, 8pm-9pm

Speed Reading
Time Out New York Lounge
downstairs at New World Stages
340 West 50th Street (btwn 8th and 9th Avenues)
FREE

Ophira Eisenberg and J. Keith van Straaten up the ante on the New York storytelling scene with the world premiere of their Speed Reading series. In less than 60 New York minutes, a select group of writers read all-true autobiographical stories directly from the page. The clock is ticking –can all the compelling stories be told before the lobby is flooded with intermission traffic from the New World Stages’ theaters? Find out!

Featuring:
Andy Christie (The Liar Show)
Adrianne Frost (Law and Order, Daily Show)
Dion Flynn (LOGO’s Big Gay Sketch Show)
J. Keith van Straaten (host of Yahoo! Answers On The Street)
John O’Donnell (The Made Up Musical)
and Ophira Eisenberg (you know, all kinds of stuff)

Pack Ten

I’m off to New York for 10 days. It’s 3:30 a.m. and I’ve been up packing. I’m not sure why, but if I have a flight the following day that takes off before 11am, I won’t go to bed the night before. I don’t think I’ve ever gone to sleep with a packed suitcase in the house. It just doesn’t feel right.

The Manhattan Monologue Slam was fun. This is my fifth or sixth time being a judge (here and in New York). Once again, the performer to whom I gave the highest score was the ultimate winner. The performers in L.A. are very gracious. Many came up to me afterwards and thanked me for being a judge, giving them feedback, etc. One even said it was an honor to perform for me. I’m pretty sure she had confused me for someone else, but it was still a nice sentiment.

I also ended up running into a bunch of folks I know and saw some really good work on stage. The venue, Safari Sam’s, is incredible. My friend Julia does their promotions and booking, and I can see why she’s so excited about it. It worked well as a theatre stage; it looks killer as a rock club.

While in New York, I’ll be producing and reading in a storytelling show on Wednesday, October 3rd. More details to come. My friend Ophira and I are putting it together right now. If all goes well, we’ll try to make it a regular thing.

I’ll have plenty to document from the family, friends, and meetings I’ll have. What I think will be most interesting is my first visit back to my college campus in over a dozen years. I somehow got nominated and then elected to my school’s alumni board, and I’ll be there for my first meeting. The school is also inaugurating a new president, and as a new alumni board member, I get to go to the celebratory dinner. Finally, this liberal arts education is paying off. I wonder if I can get some extra food to go.

Yikes… One of my cats has peed on my carry-on bag. Good thing I hadn’t packed anything in it yet.