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A funnier Conan O’Brien, van Straaten has a sharp wit and an easygoing charm… witty, contentious, quick as Mercury with the one-liners. — LA Weekly

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truth in signage

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Na Na

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Good thing the lyrics were on the screen. So easy to mess up such poetry.

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Win Sin

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How can pride be a sin when it comes with a trophy?

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Final Board

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Last game of the tourney. Beat the guy who beat me, but not by enough.

2nd place it is. Hoping I win a plant, like last year.

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Godzilla Angel

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$8 coffee

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I wanted coffee. Plain coffee. It’s $8 here. And there’s no strippers.

By posting a pic of it here, it’s now a deductible business expense.

Now, to make more than $8 this year…

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We’re Not Hand Shakers

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Don’t Assume Anything

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It is what it is.

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Please Kill Me

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If i ever appear on TV wearing a t-shirt displaying a line from my act.

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Cat-binet

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Hays is on the shelf –he’s available for adoption!

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